


Destiny

by lostinmymindforever



Series: Poems [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Poetry, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-16
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 10:57:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/722294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinmymindforever/pseuds/lostinmymindforever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I've followed him, followed them for many lifetimes, and lost them each time</p>
            </blockquote>





	Destiny

His lips are cold, lifeless  
Body broken and bloody  
I kneel beside him  
Pain coursing through me  
It shouldn’t have been him  
He had a destiny  
His path should have been easy  
His future was supposed to be filled with joy  
Not this death and destruction  
The other is near  
His body just as cold  
Still, motionless  
Their final breaths long gone  
I was too late  
Or too early  
Much too early  
The timing is wrong  
They shouldn’t be here  
Not now, not in this time  
My hand trembles as I reach out  
Touching the face I have watched  
Watched and studied for longer than I know I should  
It should be filled with life  
Happiness  
Not this broken ruin  
I look over  
Others are standing near  
Watching us, watching me as I mourn  
Mourn for someone I didn’t even get to know  
I lean forward  
Placing a single kiss on his lips  
A farewell of sorts  
I hear him take a breath  
The color coming back to his skin  
And I weep  
He was gone  
And I don’t know how or why he is back  
The wounds start to heal  
Bones and flesh reknit  
He looks at me  
Confused  
He doesn’t know my face  
Doesn’t know who I am  
The other, his brother lets out a breath of his own  
And before I can question this miracle  
I am ripped away  
Punished for my crime  
Punished for many years  
Until I almost don’t remember why   
But his face  
His eyes haunt my thoughts  
Every blow is softened   
By thoughts of his smile  
Thoughts of him  
They send me down with my battalion  
To rescue the Righteous Man  
And I feel as though my grace  
Is being pulled from me  
How can I go  
How can I be sent after what I did  
But I do as I’m told  
I go and free him  
And instead of going home  
I come and watch  
Watch the one I almost fell for  
Watch as he travels down a path  
That will lead to ruin  
And I can’t stop it  
Can’t help him  
No matter how much I want to   
I’ll be punished once more  
Ripped from him, from them  
So I watch in silence  
The others know I am falling  
Long before I do  
And when I finally know  
It’s too late to be stopped  
It’s been almost 1000 years since I felt this way  
So many years since our one and only kiss  
And yet I can still feel his lips on mine  
He calls for me  
Again and again  
And I come  
My fallen one calls and I come running  
Lost in him  
Caught up in his wake like a leaf on the water  
I can’t stop  
Can’t stop myself from being pulled closer  
Into his life, into his heart  
I’m damning us both if I do this  
And yet how can I not  
He looks at me with those eyes  
The same eyes even lifetimes later  
And I fall  
He’s scared  
Of what he’s done  
What he’s becoming  
What he feels for me  
And I shouldn’t feel  
But I do  
He makes me more than I am  
More than a soldier  
And I can’t help myself  
Can’t stop from crawling into his bed when he asks me  
Can’t stop from feeding him my blood  
Purging his body of the demon’s taint  
Can’t stop loving him  
When his brother finds out  
When he learns of our  
Whatever this is  
It doesn’t go well  
We’ve been hiding this  
For months now  
Hiding what we do  
Hiding it from him  
And yet  
I never wished to hurt him  
Never wished to hurt the other half  
Of my beloved’s soul  
It takes weeks  
Short for one such as I  
Weeks for him to forgive us  
Weeks for him to admit his jealousy  
And hurt  
And I weep  
I never meant to hurt either of them  
And yet once more I have  
It comes down to fists  
And I let him hit me  
Let him take out his frustration  
His rage  
His hurt and loneliness on me  
And in the end  
My beloved steps in  
Pulling him away from me  
Telling him this isn’t right  
Us fighting  
Us not as a whole  
Us fractured as we are  
It isn’t right  
And I know it  
But I am scared  
I’ve been hiding  
Myself  
Them  
From my brothers and sisters  
Keeping them away from   
Their destinies  
I can’t bare to see it happen  
I can’t bare to see my brothers take them  
So I do what I can  
Two of my brothers understand  
And they help me  
They destroy the finale seal  
Kill her before the others all break  
Ending all chance of the plotting  
I’m taken once more  
Beaten and broken and tortured for my crimes  
And yet I know I did the right thing  
As long as they are safe  
As long as my beloved  
And his other half are safe  
I know I did the right thing  
I’m so close to the end  
My grace almost all gone  
When the eldest steps in  
Freeing me of my bonds  
He sends me back  
Back to my love  
A mere shadow of what I was  
Broken  
Fallen  
More human than angel now  
And yet  
I have a chance  
A chance with him  
With them  
This is why I failed  
Before  
Again and again  
Why each time I found him  
Found them  
They died  
Horrible, painful deaths  
Broken and bloody  
Ripped to shreds  
They belong  
Together  
As one  
And choosing only one  
Putting a rift between them  
Is wrong  
So I do what I must  
What is needed  
There is so much I don’t know  
So much I am just doing  
Blindly  
And yet it works  
The three of us  
Together  
Somehow this works  
Somehow it’s right  
They’re stronger now  
Together  
The bond they fought  
Lifetime after lifetime  
Finally becoming whole  
Their souls, their soul  
Merging  
Becoming the one soul  
It always should have been  
And they complete me  
They fill the void  
Where my grace had been  
They make me better than I was  
Stronger in my weakness  
My beloved one  
My cherished one  
Two brothers  
My life  
My love  
My destiny


End file.
